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THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE . . . CHEESE BOY
That's what Tania said to Tony Cut 'im down to size He worked at the Velveeta plant With other cheesy guys
Cheese Boy was such an innocent fuck Tania thought, at least after Chuck Who'd stolen her cash, who stole her car and even her cigarettes, which were low tar
Tania served cocktails to drooling old men with beer bellies, out on Route Ten She was lonely after leavin' Chuck Even though he'd left her less than a buck
One night Tony dropped in With Velveeta drippin' down his chin Still, Tania found him cute, in a wacky way And he moved in, the very next day
LATER: "What a loser he's turned out to be" Tania told her best friend Lee "Dump that Cheese Boy," GirlFriend said "He's no good for nothin,' he can't be good in bed"
See, they didn't know about Crisco Man A Big Brother who carried 'round a Crisco Can Who craved Tony when he was but a teen Greasin' and probin' that boy, so tight and lean!
Crisco Man left Tony in pleasure and pain That was forever tattooed onto that tender brain He never finished high school, goin' straight to work instead And became a Cheese Boy, prob'ly 'til he's dead
CHEESE BOY. . . THAT'S ALL YOU'LL EVER BE . . . CHEESE BOY
That's what Tania said to Tony The night she threw him out He moved into a rusting Buick parked in a pond of trout
Now Tony's nights are filled with beer Followed by shots of EverClear In that Buick, he dreams his wish And masturbates, with a fish
CHEESE BOY FISHES, CHEESE BOY DRINKS CHEESE BOY FREAKS, CHEESE BOY THINKS, CHEESE BOY CUMS, AND THEN HE CRIES CHEESE BOY WORKS, CHEESE BOY DIES!
© 1 9 9 3, M a r k H ä n s e r / M a g i c a l T h i n k i n g M u s i c a l l r i g h t s r e s e r v ' d
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